Suck It Up, Buttercup!

suck it up, buttercup...

There’s been a lot of controversy as of late on our Facebook page regarding oilfield wives and what is perceived as whining. While maybe we do whine a little, I think most of it stems from the fact that we go for days and weeks on end with little to no adult conversations, we miss our husbands, and we don’t have very many friends who can relate to our lifestyle… therefore, we turn to our fellow oilfield wives community to vent, unload and if needed, get a kick in the ass. We may not all agree on topics, but it is awfully unfortunate when people resort to petty behavior and name-calling because they have a different viewpoint.

There are times when the days alone seem to drag on and on and on…. I’ll be the first to admit I can be a total Debbie Downer and fall into the “poor me’s”, luckily I went to my doctor and got on some great drugs for that. Kidding! {sort of} The oilfield wife life isn’t for everyone… it’s not for the weak, not for the needy, and definitely not for women who can’t handle being alone. Sometimes, we just have to put on our big-girl panties and be self-reliant.


One of the most common complaints I hear from other women is, “I’m bored!” Bored? Really?! Who has time to be bored? I live for the days when I don’t have a million things to do! If you are one of these bored women, find some activities to fill your extra time.

  • Browse Pinterest and you will get a ton of ideas for crafts, organization, and well, everything! Who knows? Maybe you will become so freakin’ amazing at crafting, you can open a store and sell your goods for extra money!
  • Take a class and learn a new skill! Check out what your local college has to offer or explore online instruction. Have you always been interested in learning photography? Take an introductory class or take an online workshop. Want to become a better cook? Enhance your culinary prowess and surprise your husband with a gourmet meal!
  • Volunteer! Donate some hours to your kids’ school, your local hospital, humane society, homeless shelter, etc. or find an organization that is run by volunteers such as Habitat for Humanity.
  • Go to the gym! Exercising can do wonders for your mood AND your health. Looking to lose a few pounds? Head on over to our sister site, The Sisterhood of the Shrinking Jeans for motivation and support!
  • Get a part-time job! The oilfield isn’t forever, so make sure you and your husband have plenty of money stashed away for when times are tough.

When Something Breaks, Fix It!

All women should know how to take care of some basic things around the home {and garage!}. There is nothing worse than feeling completely helpless when something breaks or isn’t working quite right and your man is hundreds of miles away with no cell phone reception. At a bare minimum, you should be capable of:

  • changing a flat tire
  • plunging a clogged toilet
  • re-connecting the chain-thingy inside the toilet tank
  • knowing where and how to turn the water supply to the house off
  • lighting the pilot light on your furnace
  • knowing where the breaker box is and what to do with it
  • repairing a leaky faucet
  • jumping a car battery
  • fixing a plugged garbage disposal

Invest in your own set of tools, so you don’t have to go digging through your husband’s messy garage when an emergency arises!

I will be the first to admit, however, that sometimes I play dumb when my husband is home, just so I don’t HAVE TO take care of things.

Make Friends!

Connect with other oilfield women in your area. Go on coffee dates, play dates, and lean on each other when times are tough. There is something to be said for having other women to rely on and talk to when you are feeling down or overwhelmed. Chances are, they’ve felt the same way! Aside from placing a “looking for friends” ad in your local newspaper, how do you go about finding other oilfield women? Check out Facebook pages and groups, local community groups, groups… you may have to do some searching and step out of your comfort zone to reach out to new people. It will be worth it, though. I promise!

What are some tips and tricks you use to make the most of your time alone?  Do you have anything to add to our list? Share below!

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About melissa

Melissa is the Founder of ROW and has been an oilfield wife for 14 years. She has been married to a wonderful man forever and is mother to six amazing children (17,14, 10, 10 and 2 and a foster baby!). Melissa knows the struggles that come along with the oilfield life. When Melissa isn't helping her little girl battle her brain tumors (Love for Jazmine Joy), she loves to travel, laugh, tend to her chickens, and dream of sunshine and mountains.

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