Decisions, Decisions, Decisions

decisionsAs an adult there are many decisions in life.  Too many.  How do you know what’s right? As a kid everything is so black and white, but as an adult decision making can be SO HARD. Sometimes there is no “right” – or there’s more than one right and you have to try and decide which is more right. It’s hard to know what you can live with and what you’ll regret.

As an oilfield wife and mom, I am flying solo half the time. Of course all parents want what is best for their kids/household/family, and even though that isn’t always the same thing for every family, as parents we all have the same good intentions of doing what we think is best. I think OF moms have an even more difficult time with this because not only are we alone half the time, but we have to make decisions alone, too. I feel like the weight of the world is on my shoulders. Well……maybe not the weight of the whole world, but at least the weight of my children. I don’t want to make it sound like my husband doesn’t help because he is a wonderful, supportive husband, but the fact of the matter is I am the one with the kids day in and day out so it’s only natural I would be the one to have to make decisions that involve them. We still talk things over, of course, and make decisions together, but all the “you have to decide right now” decisions fall on me and me alone, because I am here when he isn’t.

It’s hard being the one in charge. It can be very stressful for OF moms having to make all the decisions. The big things (deciding on finances, schools, where to live, etc) and the small things (should we get netflix, do we need new windows, should I plant tomatoes this year, etc) all require my attention and my decision making abilities.  When the well-being of the household is your responsibility, it can feel overwhelming at times. Sometimes it seems impossible to make choices. What’s best for us – private school, home school, or public school? Staying, or moving away? Investing or saving? Making home improvements, or moving to a different house? What are the RIGHT answers?  I surely don’t know. I struggle with being indecisive in general, but it’s because I’m so scared of making the wrong decision. I don’t want to mess up, especially when my kids are involved.  When it isn’t clear which answer is “wrong” and which is “right”, then it’s even that much harder to choose what to do.

Sometimes it’s really really hard to be an adult, especially if you are an OF wife/mom. Life definitely isn’t all fun and games. it would be easier to flip a coin than have to make a difficult decision.  When I feel like there’s too much pressure, I’d rather bury my head in the sand than face something head on.  I believe in the power of prayer, and believe in doing what God wants us to, but sometimes even that can be unclear.

How do you do decide on the big stuff? What do you base your decisions on? Am I the only one that struggles with the important decisions?

About jenna

Jenna has been an oilfield wife for over 12 years. Her Hot Oil Man husband started working in the oilfield a few months before they were married. The oilfield has lead them all the way from Northern CO to Alaska, where they've lived in the Matanuska Valley for 4 years. The family consists of their two children; a strong-willed daughter age 10, and a goofy son age 7. And of course what family would be complete without a couple of dogs and rabbits thrown in the mix. Jenna is a stay at home mom who doesn't “stay at home” much, and enjoys gardening, baking, reading, watching movies, four wheeling, hiking, fishing, and LOVES shopping. Since moving to the last frontier they have also started home schooling, which is another adventure all it’s own.

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