Having Him Home

Having Him Home #realoilfieldwivesWhat would it look like if Oilman was home more or all the time?  We still have no idea what will happen in the next few months.  He could get laid off, have a schedule change, or just keep working as-is (doubtful there).  The possibilities in front of us have made me wonder what having him home would look like.  As oilfield wives, we have spent countless hours complaining or crying about our husband’s being gone A LOT.  What happens when that reverses?

One of my favorite things to do is spend time with Oilman.  I love my husband dearly and I savor the time we have together.  I get really excited about seeing him daily.  I just have to imagine that when two people have become accustomed to spending at least half of their time apart and now they are spending majority of their time together, there could be a transition period.  We may need a period of time to become acclimated to the change in both of our day-to-day routines.  I have to think that there are other couples in our same position who are thinking the same things, but may be afraid to speak up for fear that someone will think they dislike being with their spouse.  We transitioned when Oilman and I moved in together and we transitioned when he started the oilfield.  These changes brought a few arguments and disagreements into our marriage.  We worked through it, moved past it, and our relationship was stronger because of it.  I have no doubt that him being home more would do the same thing.

I find myself trying to picture what it would feel like to have my husband home majority of the time either permanently or temporarily.  We haven’t always been an oilfield family.  I remember the first few years of our relationship where we saw each other every day and slept together every night.  I want to laugh now when I think about how “hard” it was when he would leave for a weekend hunting trip or three-day business conference.  When we think about that time in our lives, it feels as if it were a lifetime ago.  I have spent the majority of the time with my husband as an oilfield wife.

One thing I have grown to love as an oilfield wife is how special our time is together.  I love that I get butterflies as days off approaches.  I love how we carve out time for each because our marriage comes second behind God.  We do not allow other people’s opinions to get in the way of that.  I can be very sensitive to what people think, except when it comes to making my husband a priority.  When he is home, I don’t let little things annoy me.  Who cares if he leaves dirty dishes in the sink, or uses a clean towel almost daily?  He is only home a brief amount of time.  It is very important to me that I don’t lose that perspective.  The one where I tell myself that the little things don’t matter, just enjoy your time together.

The most amount of time that I have spent with Oilman in years is two weeks.  Majority of the time in the field he had no scheduled days off, a 20/10, or a 14/7.  I loved our two weeks together when we had that schedule, but towards the end of days off we were both itching for our routines.  I wonder if we will effortlessly settle into a new routine together or if it will take us some time?

I think there are oilfield families who are struggling right now with adjusting to seeing each other more.  I’m going to guess that there are wives like me who are wondering what the rest of the year holds and how their family life is going to change.  There are probably couples who are going to get some extra time together this year and it is going to renew their love.  For some, more time together is going to allow them to see how much they have drifted apart.  It is going to do great things for couples and it is going to signify the end for others.

There is a time for everything, and a (1)I am reminded of the bible verse from Ecclesiastes 3:1, “There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.”  I’m going to be grateful for the new season upon us whatever it may bring.  I have spent the last few seasons with my husband being gone and I’m looking forward to the possibility of the opposite.

About LC

Howdy! LC and her Oilman live in the ‘burbs north of Austin, TX. She is a real estate broker, but you won’t find her face on a bus bench and she doesn't drive a Cadillac. Oilman works in Texas as a Completions Consultant. Don’t worry, most people don’t know what that title means either. LC calls him frac guru, for short. She may be the only woman in America that hated both "Twilight" AND "50 Shades of Grey". Oilman and LC like wine, good music, their two dogs, and cervezas in Central America. Follow the adventures of LC and Oilman at: www.LivingOilfieldLife.com or on Instagram at: living_oilfield_life

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