I Am an Oilfield Wife

of wifeI am a mother and a father.  I am comforting, nurturing, and gentle. I bathe, cuddle, read to, and tuck-in my kids every night.  I am also tough when discipline is needed. I am strict. I have to decide what’s allowed, and when enough is enough. I am the cheerleader, and the coach.  I am the nanny and the teacher.  I answer every question, bandage every injury, and play games. I pray.  A lot.  I pray for my kids.  I pray for five minutes of alone time. I take extra long showers just to have some peace. It’s the only time I can hear my own thoughts. But on the rare occasion that my kids are away for the day, I feel sad and lonely.  I never quite know what to do with myself. I dread the day they are out of the house for good. I am an oilfield wife.

I am a chauffeur, cook, secretary, and housekeeper. I pick up the random Legos, stuffed animals, and hair bows that are all over the house. I turn out lights and turn down music. I clean finger prints off the windows. I try to teach manners and character building. I take care of the house, yard and car. I plan, purchase, and prepare all the meals. I run the errands and do the grocery shopping. I make sure we have both kinds of pancake syrup and the “good” kind of peanut butter. I wash, fold, and put away laundry. Then I wash, fold, and put away more laundry. I vacuum the floor after the dogs and kids track in grass. I do all the shopping and mending. I make sure each kid has enough socks and pajamas.  They also need church shoes and at least one pair of jeans without holes. I pay the bills. I coordinate everyone’s schedules and make all the appointments.  I love to ride bikes and play basketball with my kids -but sometimes I am too tired or I simply run out of time. I am an oilfield wife.

When my husband is gone, I wish he was home –and sometimes when he’s home, I wish he was gone. I get stressed when he is at work. There can be more to deal with than one person can handle on their own. I miss him and feel disconnected when he is away. I get grumpy.  I don’t sleep well. Sometimes I feel smothered when he’s home and it seems I don’t know exactly what my role is. I like to read, I like to write, I like to hike. I like watching girly movies when my husband is gone. I like going to church as a family. I like holding hands with my husband.  I like to decorate and renovate our house. I enjoy gardening…except weeding.  I like working in the yard with my husband, we make a good team. I like music. I like shoe shopping. I own too many shoes.  I love going on dates with my husband, or just having a beer together on the back porch. I enjoy family movie night.  I love just being with my kids -watching them grow and learn is the true joy in my life. I am blessed beyond measure.  I am an oilfield wife.

About jenna

Jenna has been an oilfield wife for over 12 years. Her Hot Oil Man husband started working in the oilfield a few months before they were married. The oilfield has lead them all the way from Northern CO to Alaska, where they've lived in the Matanuska Valley for 4 years. The family consists of their two children; a strong-willed daughter age 10, and a goofy son age 7. And of course what family would be complete without a couple of dogs and rabbits thrown in the mix. Jenna is a stay at home mom who doesn't “stay at home” much, and enjoys gardening, baking, reading, watching movies, four wheeling, hiking, fishing, and LOVES shopping. Since moving to the last frontier they have also started home schooling, which is another adventure all it’s own.


  1. I am an oilfield girlfriend of 8 months. We both have grown children so I’m at a loss when oilman leaves for his 2 weeks. I can relate to everything I read on this website except I don’t have the huge distraction of children. I wish I did sometimes but I do enjoy my freedom to do anything I want but it’s done alone. Any words of wisdom to help me get use to this lifestyle as I’m always sad the first couple of days when he leaves!

    • Although I do have children that take up most of my time, I also (try to) take time to do “my” stuff while my husband is gone. I learned how to play the guitar, I get pedicures, I watch TV shows he wouldn’t like…etc. Do the stuff you might not want to take the time to do while he’s home – make crafts, get a facial, join a book club, go shopping, to go the movies and see something girly – whatever you like. Then you can be more focused on him or at least on your time together while he’s home, but you’ll still enjoy the time he’s gone as well. Well…. maybe not “enjoy” it, but at least not be miserable the whole time. 😉

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