An Open Letter To My Husband’s Ex-Girlfriends

Dear Ex-Girlfriends of my Husband,

Yes, this is awkward. You’re probably asking yourself, “Why in the world is she writing to me? What could she possibly have to say?” A lot, actually. Don’t worry! I’m not here to call you out, or say bad things. I’m not going to put you down, or judge you. In fact, I’m going to thank you.

I’ve met some of you, while others remain a complete mystery. I’ve even become friends with one or two of you, as our paths continue to collide in our small-town surroundings. I don’t mind, and I hope you don’t either. You see, you give me a glimpse into the past of the person I love, the father of my child, the one I chose for the rest of my life. Sometimes, when I have too much time on my hands, I wonder why you didn’t choose him for the rest of yours. The point is, you played a part in making him who he is today.

Thank you for showing him love and loss. Without knowing loving you first, I doubt he’d be as good at loving me now. In turn, if he hadn’t known loss he would still not know that it was me he inevitably didn’t want to lose.

Thank you for allowing him to grow. It’s unfortunate you experienced the mistakes along the way to the path to me, but without mistakes no gains can be made. I’m sure when you see him now the mistakes are all you see, while I see what was on the other side of those lessons. I’m sure you’ve done plenty of growing yourself, and someone else out there is thankful for the shortcomings of your past.

Thank you for not being “the one”. After all, had you truly been, I would not be. You, undoubtedly, were right for him then and I’m happy for that. He once found happiness in you, in your time together. I’m sure when he reminisces now, he still does. He might be my husband, but that doesn’t mean he isn’t allowed to look back on his past with fond memories that once made him happy. I want those memories for him. Thank you for giving them to him then, and thank you for letting me have the happy celebrations from now until forever.

I think you should know that all the things he took from his time with you has made him an incredible husband. He’s an amazing provider, a hard worker, patient, understanding, open-minded, fun-loving, gentle, and even romantic (ok, only sometimes –but still!).

In short, thank you for being you. Thank you for influencing who he became. Thank you for the time way back when. And, most importantly, thank you for my forever.

All my Respect,

Wife of your Ex-Boyfriend